Feliz Christmas!

Boat Cookie!

Last night, Jakob and I stayed up past our bedtime to make Christmas Cookies.

At first, Jakob wasn't going to eat the cookies. He was all like, "No no. I'm going to make a chicken pot pie." And I was all like, "NO! No pot pie! You HAVE to eat the cookies! Consuming the cookie is part of the whole cookie cooking & decorating event." The he was all like, "I don't need nothin'. I'm fine."

And then...I concocted a plan. I ate a cookie myself and said, "Oh, these aren't really cooked in the middle. I messed them up!" I started to pout. He tried to comfort me and say, "I'm sure they're fine." I whined, "No! They're raw. Try 'em." He ate one. "A-HA!" I shouted, "I tricked you! They are deliciously PERFECT! I tricked you into eating a cookie. Mwa ha ha ha haaaa!"

He laughed and started choking on his cookie.

After regaining the ability to breathe again, Jakob started decorating with frosting. He's quite artistic. He made fun of this cookie for being silly, but I think it's beautiful:

It's a little boat on a fierce, wintry ocean! It's a boat cookie! Mmmmmmm. Boat cookie.

19 Times a Day

That's how often I change my mind...19 times a day.

Knowing is only HALF the battle...

I'm a worry wart.

I worry about things I can't possibly change.

Sometimes I worry that I'm not worrying enough.

I worry that I worry too much.

boy least likely to

have you heard these blokes?

boy least likely to

me likey lots.

if you enjoy alt rock with xylophones, cute/creepy marionettes and rashida jones (hottie!), check out their video for 'Be Gentle With Me' on You Tube.

i also like the tracks titled:
i see spiders when i close me eyes
i'm glad i hitched my apple wagon to your star.

So. Freakin'. Cute.

Cooper wearing Uncle Andrew's glasses.

The Prodigal Patrick

Last December, we traveled home to New England for the holidays. While we waited to board our plane at Burbank Airport, Jakob purchased a Patrick Star doll for Cooper.

Patrick hung out with us during all the festive Christmas and New Year activities. Then, when we returned to California, he was gone. We looked high and low. Alas, no fuzzy, pink starfish in green shorts was to be found. We purchased a second Patrick doll for Cooper to love.

Fast forward to last Friday. It was finally chilly enough for me to dig around the closet for my winter faux fur diva coat. I slipped it on and felt a strange bump in the side pocket. Oh my! PATRICK!

Now there's two Patricks!

I wonder what the past year has been like for Patrick #1. Was he stuck in that dark pocket the entire time? Was he waiting and praying that someone would find him and rescue him? Or did he sneak off and have wild adventures? Did he return merely because he ran out of money? Perhaps he's going to convince Patrick #2 to accompany him on his next journey.

To Cooper, two Patricks are better than one. He holds them both in his hands and tosses them around. Then he realizes that he likes playing with stuff that makes noise and he throws his Patricks to the ground and goes to play his piano, or his xylophone, or his Elmo Camera, or his talking Leap Frog phone, or his singing Animal Train.

Note to self (and grandparents): Cooper has PLENTY of toys.

Coop's Cousin is Due in March

Dear Danielle,

Remember when we used to call you Danielleeeee Belly? It applies now more than ever!

Congrats to you, Fletcher Fam! Are you and Owen in shock? Jakob and I still look at each other and think, "Holy Toast! Are WE parents?"

Pregnancy is...not fun. Don't let people try to convince you that you need to adore this state of gestation. Yes, there are wonderful things about being preggers. You get excited about being a mom. You feel your child grow and move within you. You feel close to your husband because your love made life and that's pretty effing cool.

But it's rough. Your body is hijacked. Everything swells. Even your eyeballs swell. You pee yourself. Usually when you laugh...which then makes you cray. It's cruel! The hormones can be like a Todd Solondz film--just too much to deal with.

I want you to know that I'm proud of you. You look so beautiful. Congrats to you and Owen. You are about to embark on one long, strange trip. It's fantastic.

It's a BOY!

Dear Little Man Swimming In My Sister's Belly,

I can't wait to meet you. In fact, I'm going to plan a trip to see you in the Spring. I'm just going to assume that you'll call me your Crazy Aunt Nicole. It's cool. I've worn that adjective well for serveral years. It's just another word for fun-loving.

Oh, and I already love you. I can't wait for Coop to have a cousin.

Keep healthy. See you soon.



Torture Song

Each year, I adopt a "torture song."

It's a song that I'm going to play over and over and over and over again until I'm so completely sick of it that I can never play it again.

I know. It's a sickness. I've tried to get help but...well, I'm busy and stuff.

This past year,(2007--the year that will hence forth be called, "the year that was slightly less stressful than 2006.")I was obsessed with the song 'Total Eclipse of the Heart.' And not the old school Bonnie Tyler version, which IS pure gold. Nah. I was really into the Tori Amos live from Boston 1995 rarity cover. Tori makes everything breathier and sadder.

I listened to that song most days and sometimes (once a month) I'd listen to it several times a day.

2008 is fastly approaching and I've already decided that Elton John's 'Someone Saved My Life Tonight,' is my new torture song.

It clocks in at 6 minutes and 47 seconds.
You know what that means?
Listening to it thrice a day can waste an embarrassing amount of time.

Better Than Being a Nose Picker

Cooper's latest, greatest discovery is pinching his nose so that it changes the way his voice sounds.

He's been doing this when he approaches other kids at the playground.

This child was fascinated. He watched Cooper hold his nose and yell for nearly two full minutes.

Cooper likes to grab at other people's noses, too. He won't let go until you talk and your voice sounds funny, too.

It's pretty hilarious.

Happy Eat a Turkey Day

Honestly, this Thanksgiving was a bumpy one.

Cooper was very fussy. Jakob and I quibbled about bringing the hand-held mixer to Andrew's place. That spat turned into an argument about packing all the stuff we were bringing. That exchange turned into a fight about how we turn everything into a bigger fight. Then we stopped speaking to each other for the rest of the morning.

But we got over it. And that's what I'm thankful for. We love each other enough to endure the bumps and kiss and make nice.

I'm thankful for my amazing family. I'm thankful for my generous, loving friends.

Andrew Wollman's been throwing this shindig for a decade! I'm thankful that each year I've had a place to go and make merry on Thanksgiving.

Thank you.


Happy Birthday.

I Miss You

I returned to work this week after a 5 month hiatus.

I was eager to get back to heading into the office, wearing heels and make-up, drinking flavored coffee and chatting with adults.

But I miss my boy like crazy during the day. I have pictures of him plastered all around my cube.

I want to be a mom and a producer and an artist and an actress and a good wife. I want to value myself.

It's a lot.

When exactly do things get less complicated?

By 40?

Welcome to Chez Mommy, May I Take Your Order?

Cooper can be picky about food. He DEFINITELY gets that from his Dad.

Although he was once fond of them, he's no longer a fan of peas. He's starting to reject green beans, but I'm still pushing them! He won't eat ham. He hates avacado. He doesn't like maple syrup but he enjoys pancakes.

He'll eat any cookie anytime anywhere. He likes corn, broccoli (sometimes) and carrots (sometimes). He LOVES eggs and bananas. He'll even smoosh his eggs and bananas together. Oddly enough, he likes beats, too!

Pasta, bread and potatoes are always winners. He tried a stuffed clam a while back and took to it like a true Cape Cod kid.

March to the Beat of Your Own Hurdy Gurdy

One of Coop's fave games is, "PUT LEAVES IN THE BUBBLER!!!!"

He takes every leaf off the ground (EVERY leaf) and places it into the fountain by the tennis courts. Since Coop invented this game, leaving the park has become, uh, let's just say it's more challenging...and by that I mean impossible.

Cooper runs up to other people, kids, dogs, birds (and sometimes plants) and says, "HIIIIIIIIIIIIII!" with boundless enthusiasm and volume.

He's sooooo my kid.

Most adult people think it's hysterically funny. Cooper knows how to play to a crowd. He starts performing his spirited gibberish, beating his chest and gesturing with his hands.

But the other kids on the playground tend to run away from him. They're scared. Some kids even cry when Cooper approaches them.

He's sooooo my kid.

My Son

My father took this picture of Coop playing in the fountain at Universal Studios.

He's so happy. He loves to play.

I wish I could be more like my son.


Last year, Cooper was his favorite thing in the whole world...Boston's GREEN MONSTER!

This year, Cooper is his favorite thing in the whole world...DADDY!

BEHOLD! Mini Jakob!

Coop is sporting all things Jakob! He's got the beard, the Red Sox cap, the corduroy jacket, the blue shirt and the goofy tie. He's even wearing little Converse Chuck Taylor AllStars.

AND he has the same taste in movies as Daddy, too.

Happy Pagan Holiday Everyone! May you all bloat with sugary treats!

Pumpkin Patch

I remember going to pick out a pumpkin with my dad when I was a little girl. I think I made him dig through about 22 pumpkins before I agreed on which one was "perfect."

Jakob had mentioned seeing a pumpkin patch in Sherman Oaks, so we took Cooper.

They had apple cider, kettle corn and a pro pumpkin carver.

Coop sat still in the wagon for about 17 seconds. Then I had to make him get out because he kept wanting to stand as we wheeled around...such a lil' devil.

Cooper was very into the warty gourds. We purchased his favorite--a wee bumpy green one. We named him Warty Gordon McGourd. Cooper spent several minutes trying to pick the warts off Gordon. Who woulda thought that a gourd could be so fun?

Drum roll please...I am officially an old woman. I had WAY more fun in the pumpkin patch with my toddler than I did at Halloween Horror Nights at Universal Studios.

I thought I was still "hip" and maybe even "with it." But the maximum capacity crowd, the 80+ minute wait for every attraction, the endless amounts of fog being pumped at my eyes, the continuous loud screaming, the same Rob Zombie song playing over and over, the doods chasing you with chainsaws, the doods squirting you with water, the doods snorting in your ear and the doods stabbing you with fake knives was just annoying to me. My body is tensing up just thinking about it.

That place was for teenagers who want to drink a bunch on Boones and then be scared and cling to each other and then later go make out in a Ralph's parking lot.

The pumpkin patch was much more my speed.


YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The 2nd World Series win in four seasons. Hurrah BOSTON!!!!

And who was voted MVP????


Coop passed out just before the game ended. Jakob got this great photo.

Geez, my 30th year is off to quite a start.

Yummy Spooky Cookie Time

This is my favorite time of year.

I asked Andrew what I should do with the leftover lump of cookie dough and he said, "cook it." So, I made an attempt at an 'Elephant Man' cookie:

It's no masterpiece...but it made me chuckle.

So that happened...

On Saturday, I turned 30 years old.

To mark the occasion, I performed my one-woman show in front of 30 people at a brewery in beautiful downtown Burbank.

This is me getting ready for the show. Most people don't know this, but I have to shave that moustache everyday.

I struck a deal with myself to let go of all the mucky muck. I don't usually get along with me, but we made it work. For one night, I did away with doubt and self-loathing.

It was lovely. I had so much fun. I forgot that performing could be so fun.

Thank you to Dave Lowe for making the storybook for my 'Fat Unicorn' poem.

I'm THRILLED that the shadow puppets that Jakob and I fretted over were such a hit.

Actually, the puppets stole the show.

A big ol' thank you to my father for helping me construct my background singers. They had people doubling over with laughter.

Thanks to Sean for being such a fancy, fancy butler.

The artwork added to the show, too.

There were some sleepless nights trying to get these just right, but it was worth it.

Andrew, Ryan and Jakob supported me and loved me throughout this whole wacky whirlwind. They encouraged me to do it and then wouldn't let me bail or flake or worm wiggle away from my fiercest funny or my most disturbing scary.

Thank you, guys. You are my family.

An extra phat thank you with sugary sugar goes to Jakob. Thanks for convincing me that it would all work out fine AND dandy.

All that...AND THERE WAS CAKE, TOO! Man, I freakin' love cake.